It was inevitable that at some point on this journey, I’d face some challenges; the weight has been dropping off at such a rate that I’ve got used to the constant motivational lift of losing every week. However, this week, despite what felt like a very disciplined week, I failed to move the scales towards a more favourable number. This is, of course, to be expected, and I write this not to moan, but to highlight the emotions that have come out of this experience, in what has possibly been my hardest week since I started dieting in January.
It’s been a long time since I cried on the scales (thanks, PMS). Although challenging, the beginning of this weight-loss programme was helped in large part by the fact that as soon as I started calorie-counting and exercising more regularly, the weight started to drop off incredibly quickly. Although gradually slowing from the crazy highs of four-pound losses at the beginning, I have been losing relatively persistently since then, and these small and frequent achievements have ensured that I stay well-motivated and focused.
So what changed this week? The answer is that I don’t know. Maybe my body is getting used to the weight loss and readjusting its calorie expectations. Maybe it’s tied in with my menstrual cycle. Maybe a slight change in my diet has thrown things off. Maybe it’s none of the above and I’ll never know. However, for the first time since embarking on this journey, I have heard that self-destructive voice in my head this week. You know the one; the one that says “oh let’s just give up then if it’s not working, what’s the point?” Or “to be honest you may as well eat all the chocolate, you’re not going to lose any weight anyway”. It’s been a really potent force that I haven’t contended with for months, and has tested my resilience, but I have refused to give in by reminding myself of a few things:
- I have lost a lot of weight so far (24 lbs in 16 weeks), and I should focus on what I have achieved, rather than what I haven’t.
- Even if I didn’t lose another pound, maintaining this weight would still be better for my overall health and well-being.
- Being disappointed isn’t a good reason to give up.
- Nothing tastes better than achieving your goals, in whatever form that takes.
- Frank Underwood wouldn’t give up this easily.
So with that in mind, I am redoubling my efforts: increasing my exercise, being stricter with my diet and trying to avoid booze for a while to try to kick start the losses again. After having adapted to my diet, I guess it feels like I’m starting a new one, but I’m determined to keep pushing through, because I know what success feels like, and I want more!
Wish me luck!